Control your best during the worst

My husband and I recently celebrated our tenth wedding anniversary. We had a pretty unique and special ceremony. It was quaint, personal, unique, and intentional. Fitting for who we were and what we wanted our future to represent.

The part of the wedding that still gives me the goose bumps are the vows. We wrote them ourselves and professed what we wanted to say without any repeating from the pastor, just straightforward, from the heart, vows.

I’ll always love you…you’re my tangible grace…my greatest blessing…for better or worse…let’s make forever happen. Vows represent such beautiful commitments.

In reflection of our vows, it made me think about how we usually commit to ‘better or worse’ when we are at our best. It’s when we are celebrating the better: wedding, birth of a child, a new job. It’s easier to commit to be faithful to a situation when we are at the top. It’s harder to commit when we are at the bottom and know what the worst looks like.

Of course if you’re married or have ever had contact with human kind, you know that things are not always ‘better.’ Many times, and sadly too often, things are in a ‘worse’ state. But even in the worst situation, you can always be better.

What does it take to get from worst to best? 

In general, we should want to make choices to be the best for the people around us. To make life flow smoothly so we can have a happy household. The keyword there is that we want to make good choices, but we usually don’t. That’s when the worst part of us shows up. In the moments when we are running late, feeling exhausted, taking the day’s frustration out on the salad tosser, or getting short with our child just because they asked a question. I’d say these are moments when we feel at our worst. Or at least the best surely isn’t shining through.

I hate when I let situations I can’t control get in my way.

I assume you’re with me when I say, I hate being at my worst. I’m not doing myself any good, and I’m surely not helping the people around me excel. My best effort, even if I can’t give 100%, goes much further than my pity parties and frustrations. I’ve had a recent realization that I allow things I can’t control to keep me at my worst. So if I can’t control them, why do I let them take me and those around me down? Well, because I love control, and I think many of us do.

The lesson here ::

  • Recognize what you do have control over
  • Address how those factors could benefit you + the situation
  • Don’t let what you can’t control take you down 

Easier said than done, but it gives direction and intentionality to what could keep you on the up-swing of positivity and productivity.

Commit to be better in the worst moments.

Take your kitchen for example. What could you control in that space to make you less frustrated and have the day go a little smoother? You may think you need a kitchen remodel to have an organized kitchen. False. It’s the little things. For example, the ability to find your keys or favorite coffee mug when you’re in a hurry could make a difference in how you start your day. Having a central place for a calendar could make the evenings smoother because you know what needs to be prepped for the next day and carpool schedules.

Now if you’re in crisis, easily finding your keys may seem minuscule in the grand scheme of life. And, yes, it is. But it is something that you can take control of. It’s the little things that start to bring us to our best. If we focus on attacking the chaos around us, we wont be able to conquer anything. It starts from the inside out, and it starts with small intention.

I need to change what I can and choose to let the rest go.

What little things can you control and change in your day to day actions that could make a small difference in how your day runs? What little things can you control in the way you communicate with your spouse or children? What little things can you change to make you feel better about your body? What can you take responsibility over and adjust so you can be your best?

Life is too fragile and too chaotic to let the best of us get swallowed up. And you have the lead role in being your best!

Are you having a hard time figuring out how to shed the worst and live your best? I’d love to offer you a 30 minute call at no cost, to discuss how you could have less chaos in your days. You’re guaranteed to walk away with at least one thing to help you move forward with more peace of mind. Email Michelle to find a time that’s best for you.

 

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